Try not to be self-conscious … or so critical. Don’t mope around looking for someone else to make you happy, and remember that the vast majority of homosexuals are looking for a superman to love and find it very difficult to love anyone merely human, which we unfortunately happen to be.
Homosexuality is like a boarding school in which there are no vacations.
Tomorrow the rush of men, all working for a living, would drown him; but now, at this moment, in this soft green twilight, this soft green Sunday evening, when the heart of the world seemed to lie beating in the palm of his hand, he sat in that huge house upstairs terrified that he would never live.
You are doomed to a life that will repeat itself again and again, as do all lives-for lives are static things, readings of already written papers-but whereas some men are fortunate to repeat a good pattern, others have the opposite luck-and you can surely see by now that your life is doomed to this same humiliation, endlessly repeated.
But Malone was thinking now and as he watched the men lighting cigarettes for each other in the dark, having sex beneath the trees, he turned to his friend and said in a wondering voice: “Isn’t it strange that when we fall in love, this great dream we have, this extraordinary disease, the only thing in which either one of us is interested, it’s inevitably with some perfectly ordinary drip who for some reason we cannot define is the magic bearer, the magician, the one who brings all this to us. Why?
They were the most romantic creatures in the city in that room. If their days were spent in banks and office buildings, no matter: Their true lives began when they walked through this door-and were baptized into a deeper faith, as if brought to life by miraculous immersion. They lived only for the night.
There are three lies in life,
He did not wish to be the man to whom nothing was ever to happen.
For you cannot live in New York City very long and not be conscious of the niceties of being rich-the city is, after all, an ecstatic exercise in merchandising-and one evening of his visit to Venezuela Sutherland sat straight up when he read a line of Santayana’s: “Money is the petrol of life.