She’d wanted to grow up to be a superhero, and in a left-turn kind of way she felt like she was on track.
OKAY, SO HERE’S the thing. My mother’s worst fear has come true. I’m a nymphomaniac. I lust after a lot of men. Of course, maybe that’s because I don’t actually actually have sex with any. And some of my lustings probably aren’t
Everyone’s childhood is strange. It prepares you for the strangeness of adulthood.
If God had wanted me to lose weight he would have made sure there was creamed spinach for dessert.
Riley reminded herself that she was a professional, and stabbing Emerson with her nail file wouldn’t be appropriate.
You must be a terrible burden to your mother. I am feeling so sorry for her not to have a proper daughter.”
Mrs. Apusenja – To the Nines
Omigod. He gave you a car?”
“He said it was an investment in our working relationship. What does that mean?”
“What kind of car is it?”
“A new Porsche.”
“That’s at least oral sex.”
“Be serious!” I said.
“Okay, the truth is . . . It’s beyond oral sex. It could be, you know, butt stuff.”
“I’ll return the car.”
“Stephanie, this is a Porsche!”
“And I think he’s flirting with me, but I’m not sure.
phone and warn her I’d
I always listen,
I knew there were no such things as death cooties. Unfortunately, that’s an intellectual fact. And death cooties are an emotional reality.