It seems to me that when you look back at a life – yours or another’s – what you see is a path that weaves into and out of deep shadow. So much is lost. What we use to construct the past is what has remained in the open, a hodgepodge of fleeting glimpses. Our histories, like my father’s current body, are structures built of toothpicks. So what I recall of that last summer in New Bremen is a construct of both what stands in the light and what I imagine in the dark where I cannot see.
I may not beleive in God, but I believe in guilt and no one wants to dick around with eternity, even if it isn’t there.
It’s always been you and me, Red. Even before we were us. You’ve always had the control in this relationship. Some things may distract us, but I’ll always come back to you
Love is the path of least resistance.
No matter where I find myself, this is the time of day I love best. The time that’s mine alone. It’ll be dawn soon, and I’m sitting here writing. Like Buddha, born from his mother’s side (the right or the left, I can’t recall), the new sun will lumber up and peek over the edge of the hills.
I was so hungry to learn. My mother drilled this into me. When you read,she said, you know–and you can help yourself and others.
OKAY, SO HERE’S the thing. My mother’s worst fear has come true. I’m a nymphomaniac. I lust after a lot of men. Of course, maybe that’s because I don’t actually actually have sex with any. And some of my lustings probably aren’t
She said it was no use waiting for trust to come to you fully formed, and then go and create a life and home together; you just had to start living with the person you loved best, and trust would build over time.
For the LORD your God is a merciful God; he will not abandon or destroy you or forget the covenant with your forefathers, which he confirmed to them by oath.
My life has been long, and believing that life loves the liver of it, I have dared to try many things, sometimes trembling, but daring, still.