If my life is surrendered to God, all is well. Let me not grab it back, as though it were in peril in His hand but would be safer in mine!
As soon as you start writing, even if it is under your real name, you start to function as somebody slightly different, as a “writer”. You establish from yourself to yourself continuities and a level of coherence which is not quite the same as your real life… All this ends up constituting a kind of neo-identity which is not identical to your identity as a citizen or your social identity, Besides you know this very well, since you want to protect your private life.
Today’s my birthday On mans scale 53 is a life more than 1/2 over. On the infinite scale of an eternal being I am just a cell of life that has forever to go!
You took life by the horns and tried to hold on tight, for fear of being ripped to shreds, left bloodied and battered.
[about suicide] And why is it the biggest sin of all? All your life you’re told that you’ll be going to this marvellous place when you pass on. And the one thing you can do to get you there a bit quicker is something that stops you getting there at all. Oh, I can see that it’s a kind of queuejumping. But if someone jumps the queue at the Post Office, people tut. Or sometimes they say, “Excuse me, I was here first.
Freedom is my soul-spirit set free from any chains.
She leans over the desk to write and even though I feel bad for doing it, I watch her body as she does. Her shirt lifts just a little as she’s bending over and whether she’s aware of it or not, her lower back is exposed. I’ve spent the last eight years ignoring this girl, but one small view of her back and it’s putting my body into overdrive.
I’ve never wanted to kiss someone there so much in my life.
I think I feel it
The nimble, fleeting emotion
That novels and authors desperately
Try to convey in ink and heart blood
Whose shadow festers in the loins
Of teenagers and their insatiability
The hidden thing none of us can see
Yet we all disagree what it looks like
If only it were love… simple, infinite love
But this was more, this was bloodshot madness.
Death would be an extremely bad thing like most of us paint it, if being dead were painful.
I can’t afford to take responsibilities for others’ lives. It’s all I can do to bear the weight of my own life and my own loneliness