Because ‘You’re perfect just the way you are,’ is what your guidance counselor says. And she’s an alcoholic.

Like

He was a poet who sometimes taught Free University classes or travelled in the western states of Utah, Nevada, and Arizona, speaking to high school English classes, stunning middle-class boys and girls (he hoped) with the news that poetry was alive-narcoleptic, to be sure, but still possessed of a certain hideous vitality.

Like

Come on! If Harry can destroy the horcruxes, Frodo can destroy the ring and Percy can defeat Kronos, you can get out of bed!

Like

Whenever a woman tries to put you out of temper, turn the tables, and put HER out of temper instead. They are generally prepared for every effort you can make in your own defence, but that. One word does it as well as a hundred; and one word did it with Limping Lucy. I looked her pleasantly in the face; and I said-“Pooh!

Like

With him big Phil from Notting Hill an old “face” from the sixties a pin up gangster with a “mars bar” weal scraping his left cheek and of course two “wag” slags in tow trussed up like French Poodles with “Bratz babe” stares and Gucci Handbags

Like

Yo Mama’s so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest, they said, “Sorry, no professionals.

Like
1 2 3 95