With a sense of humor like that, you could make a living as a garbage man anywhere in the country.
How does knowing ‘things could be worse’ than what I already deem awful make me feel any better? You mean I could sink even lower? Oh joy!
I’m so well-rounded I’m almost spherical.
I forgot my purse of laughter when I dressed this mornin’,” she told me. “Have you not bought anythin’ the last few days? Prices have gone up. Pay or starve, it’s all one to me.
I once saw you in a tuxedo and all I wanted to do is eat.
Kaitlyn froze and then said in a low tone, “That’d better be your gun.”
“Why yes, I always pack my gun where it’ll blow my balls off.”[Landon]
October: This is one of the peculiarly dangerous months to speculate in stocks. The others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, December, August and February.
The Witcher swore quietly, looking at the sharp, angular, even runes drawn with energetic sweeps of the pen, faultlessly reflecting the author’s mood. He felt once again the desire to try to bite his own backside in fury. When he was writing to the sorceress a month ago he had spent two nights in a row contemplating how best to begin. Finally, he had decided on “Dear friend.
He’s crazy,” Bruno said, twirling a finger in circles around the side of his head and whistling to indicate just how crazy he thought he was. “He went up to a cat on the street the other day and invited her over for afternoon tea.” “What did the cat say?” asked Gretel, who was making a sandwich in the corner of the kitchen. “Nothing.” explained Bruno. “It was a cat.
I turned to Dionysus. “You cured him?”
“Madness is my specialty. It was quite simple.”
“But…you did something nice. Why?”
He raised and eyebrow. “I am nice! I simple ooze niceness, Perry Johansson. Haven’t you noticed?